I have no idea what that title means, I miss my ferret though, that's her name, Epiphany..she's in Louisiana, while I'm here in South Dakota.

I've come to this realization, dunno if it means I'm getting depressed or what, probably, seems to happen quite often. XD

I'm living some sort of odd half-life. I really don't know what to use as a comparision however, so I'm just guessing here. I wake up in the morning, or afternoon what have you, looking forward to nothing really but maybe going online or playing pokemon. Video games in general really.

I have no friends, no real job. Okay, I have one friend. She lives about four hours from here, and currently I can't get a hold of her to tell her I'm going back to Louisiana soon. I've only really seen her once ever and that was to go to an Anime Convention, that was one of the weirdest things I've ever been to in my life.

My job consists of waking up and catering to spoiled brats, cleaning up after them, doing their laundry, dishes, taking them to dance and school and to the mall when they decide they need some new clothes to accompany the hundred and so outfits they already own. Oh it's lovely. I haven't had a day off scince the anime convention which was uh, September something.

I don't know if people see a normal life as one with having friends 'n such..cause all I have is the three or four people I talk to online, and I'm not even that great of a conversationalist. Maybe I should try to find a boyfriend or a girlfriend, yeah right, I don't even know -how- to go about doing that. >.>; Look at me blabbing away on DA like anyone really cares. And I don't even care if they do or not, I just feel like talking about crap really..I just happened to have the DA website up.

I know really what the whole problem is, I'm just a big blob of lazy.

And to quote a previous journal:

"Perhaps though, it's just an onset of depression.. Or lack there of.. Or lack of feeling in general. Like some sort of slump.. Though, I think I could blame it on laziness.. Because, well that's probably what it is..

A, shut up, the world hates you, get over it already, type feeling.. A feeling like..just go to sleep for ever and ever.. Even though you have work in a few hours.. Shut the heck up, everyone only tollerates you type mood.

I think this might be a bit what it feels like when people threaten suicide, or attempt it.. Only mutiplied a hundred times or so..

Just..blah.. Basicially. A crushing, heavy, the world beating down apon me blah mood..

Hope it goes away soon."
/End rant.